Week 4 – back and forth

Wow..

4 Weeks in and I’m realizing that programming has me again.

It’s not bad but I’ve made progress.

My voice is more vibrant, I feel more heard and I certainly I feel less intimated by the sheer fact that I started to read outloud.

Some of the things that came up this week include..

“who are we doing this for?”

For much of my life, I wanted to please other people.

Maybe it was a cultural upbringing but it definitely had to do with the fact that if I was “good” I got something and if I was bad “I would know about it”.

Hmm, I wonder if that’s a common theme…

Anyways, I’ve been on a recent project with the business I’ve started and it had me looking for “motivational quotes”.

Those pretty ones you constantly see on facebook and wonder “how did they make them”…

and I stumbled onto one that has made it simply awesome.

“I’m going to make you so proud” – Note to self

It hit me right then.. The reason we’re so scared, the reason we’re so afraid is because we think we have to “prove” something to someone else.. instead of realizing.. we’re on this path ourselves..

Although validation is nice at times.. I realize it’s like love in a relationship..

“You can’t love someone else if you don’t love yourself first because then you’re simply relying on someone else to dictate the emotional state”…

So this week, every time I was slightly nervous.. I would run the mind script..

I’m going to make you so proud..

I’m going to make you so proud..

I can’t wait to read this in a few weeks/months and reflect back on this week.\

 

 

 

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